Ripping my hair out!!!!

Ok, I have to take a break from my positive kick and vent a little. My daughter is driving me crazy. She is an angel at school and a powder keg at home. She is becoming so defiant, flippant, and unreasonable. Deep down I know that she is probably having a lot of trouble with the move and this is why I am seeing such a change in her behavior. She is probably taking it out on us because she knows we are not going anywhere. However, this doesn't make it any less frustrating or confounding. I want to keep the lines of communication open, but it is so hard. She is downright rude to her sister and I, even in public! I know some of you are in complete disbelief right now. Me too! It is like living with a Changeling. Having studied Pedagogy in school I feel like I am expected to have all the answers, but parenting a child is sooooo different than teaching a child. I find myself wanting spend time with Emily because she is so sweet and accommodating, however I know it is exactly the wrong thing to leave Kenzie out. It will only make her feel more isolated and cut communication completely, exacerbating the situation. So, we include her and she makes everyone miserable. AARGH!!! She is monopolizing my attention and it is all negative. I feel like this penalizes Emily and we are right back to square one. How do I show her I love her without validating her current behavior? Chasing my tail.... I need some ideas!!!!! I need a script or an owners manual, maybe a hotline where you press one because your kid is broken. I need a freaking Thinking Spot in somebody else's house!!!!